February 2012
192 posts
Anonymous asked: Sherlock, why don't you have Facebook? It would help your boredom greatly.
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Daily Anderson Defamation Post
Anderson has quite a few phobias, some of which are easily manipulated.
For example, he has acquired a phobia of the number 221.
- SH
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ask-watson:
When you see a shampoo bottle, you’d assume that it’d be filled with shampoo. Unfortunately, I should have given my bottle the benefit of doubt. It was filled with piss.
-JW
Wasn’t me.
- SH
Anonymous asked: umm ok *peeks* ... there are so many Sherlock nowadays, are you... a Sherlock too? But you don't have a pipe....
Anonymous asked: umm... *hides behind the sofa* I'm confused
Anonymous asked: umm.... hello?
Anonymous asked: I bet you French police don’t use yellow crime scene tape but prefer cordon bleu.
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nofutureexorcists replied to your post: A package of Drosophila finally came today.
Hey, I did a lab report on those this week. Are you doing genetic experiments?
No, not genetic. Testing certain responses to classified stimuli. They are quite common, and extremely versatile.
Good luck with your lab report.
- SH
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A package of Drosophila finally came today.
FINALLY.
- SH
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Daily Anderson Defamation Post
Anderson isn’t very funny, as you can imagine.
We were on a case in France, and he tried to joke around with the French police by saying this:
“I bet you French police don’t use yellow crime scene tape but prefer cordon bleu.”
He was suspended from the case.
- SH
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Anonymous asked: WHY WOULD YOU POST THE ANDRONA LISA?!!!! MY EYES! I'M SCARED FOR LIFE!
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the-girl-with-the-redvines asked: You are cute,...
ask-watson:
Cute? Yeah, see, I’m a middle-aged man who’s lost all hope in getting married and shares a flat with an eccentric sociopath because I can’t pay the bills. It’s your opinion.
Oh, now that was just an unnecessary stab at our living arrangements. If I’m just here to pay part of the rent, I might as well just give you a large amount of cash and take my leave, hm? Don’t...
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Anonymous asked: About Anderson: I have seen him in something else...You should find out if he is into medieval recreations. He appeared as a villager. Just search Jonathan Aris Merlin (though why he was using the name Jonathan I have no idea) There are some images that have truly ahem unique expressions. It would make good blackmail, I mean conversation. Especially with Donovan...
captain-sherlock-mcdoctor-pants asked: D'aww. I think you were cute as a ten year old! But to be intellectual: how often do you get screened for things such as cancer? Just...just wondering.
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Anonymous asked: I agree. Anderson is really disgusting, especially with a beard.
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Due to strange occurrences-
I briefly stayed off the Internet. Rereading these embarrassingly childish posts is amusing and terrifying, simultaneously.
I suppose we return to normal now.
Whatever “normal” was, exactly.
- SH
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What...?
Why are you all calling me Sherly and offering me strange condolences and gifts?
I don’t know what you’re all talking about at all. And I hardly think any of you quite know how I was as a child.
This must be some sort of Internet prank.
- SH
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kaleigh-marie asked: I only ask because I don't want to call you the wrong thing and upset you. And ten years old! why you're practically a man, you are. Well, I think I'm going to be here for awhile, would you like to play or read? We can do whatever you like!
ask-anthea asked: I always did want a little brother. My wish has come true. - A
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Stop it! You’re scary, you’re weird, and I don’t know who you are, so stop yelling at me! I won’t help you find some silly airport, if you’re being so mean to me!
You act just like father!
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It’s really terrible. I wish I could just move elsewhere to someplace with more intelligent people so we could have intelligent conversations and all...
ask-anthea asked: Oh, my. Sherly, dear. You are such an adorable little ten year old. I just want to cuddle you and keep you safe forever. - A
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No! The children in my class are really, really dull, and they don’t understand anything. I figure that they have mutated brains that impair their abilities of speech, cognitive thinking, and reasoning.
Plus, they all bully me. Not that it matters because I don’t like any of them, anyways.
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No cakes before bedtime, just like the jammie dodgers. It’ll give...
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Anonymous asked: You're awfully grown for one your age. I'm surprised that your mummy hasn't given you a bit more freedom.
kaleigh-marie asked: I'm sorry, I didn't realise you were the tallest of your class. What an accomplishment! Don't worry about us,dear, we are all friendly with good intentions :). How old are you Sherly? Do you like being called Sherly or just Sherlock?
kaleigh-marie asked: Sherlock? You've gotten a bit, um, *sizes you up with her hand* smaller. But okay then! Hello there :)
Anonymous asked: Oh my goodness, you are precious! Would you like a sweetie?
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Anonymous asked: Can I touch your face? *touches face anyway*
pen-pencil-quill asked: Can you salvage any part of Vladimir and use those parts to help create a new violin? It does sound a bit like Frankenstein, I'll admit, but it's better than saying goodbye to an old friend forever.
Anonymous asked: Oh, dear Lord. Hi, Sherly! Mycroft and Mummy are going to be out for a while, so why don't you just talk to me for a while, until one of them or John come back? Do you have any interesting experiments and/or cases to tell me about? Sorry, I'm not really used to interacting with children...
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This is a very late bedtime.
But I have to finish discovering why the snails and slugs I found on the front steps have slightly different slimy mucuses!
Besides, Mummy and Mycroft seem to be out!
- Sherly
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ask-sherlock asked: Are you the Doctor, sir?...
thedoctortheoncomingstorm:
I sure am the Doctor!
Of course I exist, you’re talking to me right now, aren’t you?
But you’re absolutely correct, you know. Old people never do understand anything correctly, that’s why you never, ever, ever want to grow up.
See, Mycroft, he does exist.
I told him so. But he’s too busy trying to be an adult. I’ll never stop experimenting, though!...
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Anonymous asked: MAGIC!ANON: You are ten years old for the next twenty-four hours.
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Violin is irrepairable.
Well, I figured as much, seeing as how I basically crushed it with the force of the gravity of my fall. The bridge is snapped, the fingerboard is split, the pegbox is smashed, and the F-holes have allowed large cracks to form.
It is technically reparable, but it would take far too long, far too much money, far too much effort. I could repair it myself, but John is against the idea and insists...
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kaleigh-marie replied to your post: I broke my violin.
No! I’m so sorry to hear that, can you get it repaired?
Whether any of you are sincerely concerned or more mildly amused, I will be sending in for a consultation to see if it is able to be saved.
Gladstone was being a nuisance in the flat, so I chased him out of my room, only to trip over one of his dog bones and onto my violin.
It was a...
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I broke my violin.
- SH
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Daily Anderson Defamation Post
Anderson tried to smell more approachable and sexier by buying a Lynx body spray called Attract.
He was attacked by the sniffer dogs the next day on the crime scene.
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